Posts: 2782 |
Hanne Posted Fri 21 Dec, 2007 8:15 AM |
12 good advices for Christmas. I apologise for any mistakes since I've translated them myself.
1. If you eat something without anyone noticing, it does not contain any calories.
2. If you drink diet soda while eating a chocolate bar, all calories will be eliminated by the lack of calories in the sugarfree drink.
3. If you eat in the company of others, the calories do not count - as long as you eat the same as the others.
4. Foods consumed for health reasons do not count, such chocolate, cognac or cheese cake.
5. If you make sure to fatten all persons in your immediate surroundings, it will make you look thinner.
6. Foods consumed during film screenings do not count since they form part of an entertainment concept, and not your diet. This is true for e.g. chocolate bars, popcorn, mints, french almonds and all types of sweets.
7. Broken or crushed bisquits do not contain any calories since they disappeared when the bisquits broke.
8. Everything licked from spoons and knives while e.g. making sweet desserts, do not contain any calories either.
9. Foods with the same colour contain the same amount of calories, for instance spinach and pistachio ice cream.
10. The colour of chocolate is universal, and therefore it can replace any other kind of food.
11. If you eat while standing up, the food will not contain any calories. This is probably due to gravity's influence on the calorie density.
12. Everything you eat from another person's plate is calorie-free since the calories rightfully belong to the other person. Therefore, they will stick to his plate.
So enjoy Christmas without feeling guilty! |
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Posts: 1790 |
lindsey22295 Posted Fri 21 Dec, 2007 8:21 AM |
LOL
Guilty to number 8 these past few days.
This doesn't have to do with Christmas, but I'd also like to add that calories do not count during final exam week. |
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Posts: 2782 |
Hanne Posted Fri 21 Dec, 2007 8:26 AM |
| That's good to know lol |
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Posts: 259 |
la femme qui Posted Fri 21 Dec, 2007 8:37 AM |
Hanne wrote: 8. Everything licked from spoons and knives while e.g. making sweet desserts, do not contain any calories either.
Isn't that one true all year round?
And, by the way, all foods have negative calories during exam time ;) |
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Posts: 1979 |
Ursina Posted Fri 21 Dec, 2007 12:05 PM |
| oh aye and eating food while on the travis mb doesn't count either :) |
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Lemon Grinner Posted Fri 21 Dec, 2007 12:15 PM |
Lol number 12 is sooo true =P
Also I believe that booze contains no calories, so when I have these days where I eat nothing and drink it counts for nothing.
And drunken munchies have no calories either. I dunno if this has been said yet. But have a Big Mac at 3am, pissed. It is calorie free! |
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Posts: 8468 |
AbsolutPurple Posted Fri 21 Dec, 2007 12:47 PM |
Ursina wrote: oh aye and eating food while on the travis mb doesn't count either :)
ditto for "eating while you're at work" |
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Posts: 2782 |
Hanne Posted Fri 21 Dec, 2007 1:13 PM |
With all these exceptions, we should all look like models... in theory, of course!
:oP |
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Posts: 8468 |
AbsolutPurple Posted Fri 21 Dec, 2007 1:15 PM |
Hanne wrote: With all these exceptions, we should all look like models... in theory, of course!
:oP
who says we don't ? |
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Posts: 2721 |
Yulia Nox Posted Fri 21 Dec, 2007 1:21 PM |
Hanne wrote:
9. Foods with the same colour contain the same amount of calories, for instance spinach and pistachio ice cream.
haha
good one xD! |
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Posts: 2782 |
Hanne Posted Fri 21 Dec, 2007 1:34 PM |
AbsolutPurple wrote:
who says we don't ?
Maybe some do, but if 'we all' includes me, then I can safely say that we don't all look like models lol |
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